Nenya

Contemplating Life

Contemplating Life

August 8, 2010

So we hold our breaths and close our eyes

There is love in our bodies and it holds us together
But pulls us apart when we’re holding each other

Because what we have cannot exist
So we never say the words
We never make it real
The unvoiced thoughts our invisible enemy
-You hurt me, but the pain is so sweet-
-Like salt in wounds that never fully healed-
We walk away with the hole in our soul
Digging it deeper as we go
Destroy what was never there
At all
-Maybe it’ll go away-
-Somehow, someday-
-But you and I know it’s here to stay-

And I’m not showing you the door
You couldn’t look me in the eyes
So I’ll dim the lights

A different path, but it looks familiar
Awakening the fear that sleeps within my brain
-Could this end the same?-
And the echoes of the future and past haunt me
Fleeting moments of what hasn’t been and what could never be
Memories piercing like needles through my skin
Contaminating all the images within
-Can you see the what-ifs piling up?-
-Can you see it will never stop?-
-Can you raise me up?-

Let’s forget that I am not supposed to be here
Let’s pretend I tripped and fell into your arms
-Don’t show yourself out-
Let me scratch your skin until I draw blood
Let me drink the fear from your mouth
-You know that I can-

Let’s sleep together
Right now

Every step I consciously took away from you
Biting back the will to drown in your furtive fervor
Eventually turned to be another step closer to you
And every new touch just burns hotter than before
-There is no escape-
So flow through me with my imagination
Let it recreate your own visualization
-Read my mind-
Watch as it unfolds before your eyes
Watch it burn the final barricades inside
-Touch my skin-
Make the one mistake that will change our point of view
Waste the life we knew
-Don’t look back-

And sink your thirstiest teeth into my neck

Title and italic parts in order of appearance taken from:

Pain of Salvation - Sisters
Florence & The machine - Hardest of hearts
Pendulum - Encoder
Porcupine Tree - Sleep together
Pain of Salvation - Darkness of mine

Earlier musings